Office Appropriate

I've rescued this oldie-but-goodie from my desolate, lonely, neglected MySpace blog...enjoy!

The overall stylishness of our country has been in a downward spiral since the 1950s. The office used to be a place where people still had some sense of pride in their appearance, but alas, the last stronghold of style and class in our country is slowly being toppled. Here are some simple steps YOU can take to reverse this trend and start dressing for success!!!

1. Claw Clips as a hair accessory. These have long since been relegated to a stylist's tool when performing a blow-out. You should not wear these outside of your house. Even if they have rhinestones. Especially if they have rhinestones.

2. Pant suits on women. Note: Check the rear view in a three-way mirror. Also, note pants hemlines and adjust accordingly. Also, bodies unfortunately do not stay the same size forever! Check your rearview every time you leave the house, not just when you buy the pants.

3. Suit rules: Hose are REQUIRED. I know you hate them, but I bet you also hate waking up before the sun to get to your suit-requiring job. And you do that anyway, don’t you?
When wearing a suit, makeup is also REQUIRED. I know, I know you “don't wear makeup”. Let’s try something new kids, you might even like it.
Dry hair (with a blow dryer) is REQUIRED. If you got up that late, what's another 20 minutes?
If you still think all of this is too much effort, then just do yourself and everyone else around you a favor and don't wear a suit.

4. Upon stepping off the platform after recieving your college diploma, lean over and remove the open-toe platform black sandals you've been wearing to bars/formals/etc.during college. Throw them in the trash and go directly to an established department store and purchase a pair of closed-toe neutral pumps. This is what you wear to work with your suit. (and dry, styled hair and makeup).

5. Buy a nice coat. No Northface at the office, please. (if you can wear it hiking or to a sporting event, then don't wear it to work).

6. "Casual" Fridays: Note the use of "casual" and not "sloppy". Wear a pair of dark denim jeans, preferably purchased within the last 3 years (after you check your rear-view, of course!) Shoes should be stylish flats or sneakers, not the kind you wear to the gym. Wear a cute top or sweater, no tees please. Rule of Thumb: Any pants, shirts, or shoes you would wear to clean or paint your house in are not casual office attire.

8. Don't mix and match. It sounds good in theory, but most people are really bad at the "match" part of the equation. Purchase outfits instead of peices.

9. Panty Lines. Yikes!

10. Wear a bra (appropriate in size, color, and support level).
Some friends of mine may be better "equipped" to give advice on this, but for starters:
NO WHITE. White shows up under white, check it out in the mirror under lights if you don't believe me. Buy something flesh toned, and please, save the lace for the bedroom. It makes these really funny looking bumbs under your blouse....and speaking of bumps under your blouse....
Padding is not just for the less-endowed. It is also great for keeping your personal body temperature a secret. And don't think no one is looking; believe me, everyone has noticed that you're cold! Bad bras will have people staring at you, and not in a good way. It's kind of like the way you can't help staring at a car accident. You know you shouldn't but it's so awesomely BAD you just can't believe it!
You wear a bra every day...spend the money and get one that does the job!

I promise taking the above advice is a really great career move :-)