De-coding Dress Codes

I've always been under the impression that "dress code" was an attempt to help people choose an appropriate outfit and show up feeling like a million bucks, or at least wear something they knew would be in keeping with the event/restruant/party they are attending so as not to embarrass themselves or make others uncomfortable.

If you're from the South, you probably also had the added benefit of education by your mom/grandmother, even dad who would let you know in no uncertain terms if you were inappropriately dressed and would NOT let you leave the house until you were...(One of the most embarrassing incidents of my teenage years was my dad telling me he could see my PINK BRA through my dress and to either change that or the dress immediately).

Anyway, Dress Codes are apparently not what they used to be...instead of clarifying what to wear, they just seem to make it more difficult...here are some I've encountered just over the last year:

Dressy Casual (my favorite oxymoron)

Cocktail Casual

Hollywood Sexy (huh?)

Smart Casual

Casual Sophistication

"Festive" (this gives me nightmares)

Retro Cocktail Chic (is it a costume party?)

Smart Elegant

Texas Black Tie (belt buckle, spurs, cowboy hat with a tux? Maybe?)

Comfortable Cocktail (?)

I feel we could debate the meaning of any one of these for hours and come up with no solid answer.

No wonder celebrities have such a hard time on the red carpet these days.