Miss America 2010

Its been a while since I strutted my tanned, toned, tucked, pulled, squeezed, and sprayed stuff on a pageant stage, but I still watch Miss America religiously. Here are my thoughts, musings, and comments on this year's show:

Miss America's camo-military dress worn as a shout-out to the troops was henious. I appreciate the thought, but couldn't they just drape her in a flag or something?

You can always count on Miss Hawaii to dance the hula.

It's not a talent competition without someone singing "O Mio Babbino Caro"

Yay for all the cute blondes in the finals!

# of Top Ten that turned their onstage question into a "Why I'd be a great Miss America" monologue: 3

Thank goodness most of them have stopped turning themselves orange with tanner.

Singing still seems to be the "fall-back" talent...but dancers are definitely more entertaining to watch.

Damn! I was pulling for Miss Tennessee...but congrats Virginia! Have a great year!

***And I really think this song (while I freely admit to loving it in this post) was kinda inappropriate for the finale song of a pageant with so much talk of being role models and such...

The Best of Sky Mall

After all the cross-country flights I've done over the last year and a half, I can't believe it took me this long to pick up a copy of Sky Mall. Here's some of the awesome products I've been missing out on:

The Slanket (the Snuggie's trashy cousin?)
The Indoor Dog Restroom (fake grass on top of a tray)
Wrist cell phone carrier (strap your cell phone to your wrist?!)
Potty Rock (again for dogs)
Litter Kwitter--potty train your cat!
Footed Pajamas

Dang. If only I'd discovered this before Christmas...

Golden Globes

Since there are about 589 versions of The Best/Worst Dressed List for the Golden Globes, I'm not going to put another one out there. I just have two notes:

Please stop wearing beige dresses...especially if you're white (in the Caucasian sense, not as in I-really-need-a-tan. Pale is the new tan :-)

I'm really over Halle Berry looking AMAZING all the time. It's honestly getting a little dull...shake it up for the SAG awards Halle. I challenge you to to fashion-disasterdom! There has got to be at least one dress in this world you can't pull off...find it! If not, at least go a few sizes to small.

Miley is sooo 2009...

Queen Miley reigned supreme in 2009 with "Party in the U.S.A."

Admit it...you pretended to think it was annoying but you secretly downloaded it and rocked out in your car by yourself, and you know every word.

But even the most catchy tween-pop songs can get overplayed, and we now have a new embarrassingly awesome jam to love but pretend to hate for 2010.

This song.

The video is horrendous, but I dare you to get this song out of your head.

Also, does anyone else think this chick vs. Avril Lavigne would be the best girl-fight ever?

2009 College Football Season Obituary

This football season started optimistically for me, and quickly turned ugly. My Dawgs tumbled from their precariously high perch in the rankings early in the season, and my secondary love Auburn soon followed...the downward spiral continued throughout the fall until I finally found myself today in what my family would consider the 7th Circle of Hell, A.K.A. 5 hours trapped in an airplane full of Bama fans.

The final nail in the coffin, so to speak, is giving up precious sleep time my poor jet-lagged body craved to watch Alabama win a national title. Yes, I'm "going rogue" as an SEC fan in not pulling for my conference, but I was trained to hate Alabama from early childhod, much the same way I imagine the Isrealites and Palestinians train their young, so I really have no choice.

R.I.P. 2009 Football Season...you will not be missed.